Being pregnant

Approximately 7 weeks to go and am getting more anxious every day.
Every mum assured me that the delivery is gonna hurt but they also say that seeing the baby will make you forget all you’ve been through. Every body’s asking me when the due date, when will I start my maternity leave. Discovery channel & national geographic channel both aired different documentaries about what’s going on in the womb (which is truly amazing!!!!) and they both ended it with actual deliveries (which send shivers down my spine. Hearing mothers telling their battle stories have successfully make me flinch. Watching and knowing that it’ll happen to me soon is quite horrifying. Aaaarrrrggghhhhhh……..). I so envy those who got epidurals covered in their insurance. Knowing how doctors in my country do their job, I suspect they rather do c-section than giving mothers epidural or some sorts of pain relieve.
All I want is to get this over with.

Anyways, just like everything else in life, pregnancy has its ups and downs.
These are mine.

Finishing nutrition requirement. Sometimes it’s just tiresome to remember to drink your milk twice a day (I like milk but I think my tolerance is a big glass a day, not more), to take my vitamins (the doctor gave me 4 kinds!!!!! How bothersome), to feel guilty and sometimes angry if da company cannot provide such nutritious food for lunch (the caterer sucks!!! But am too lazy to be out to get better food. Guess I’ll ask mum to arrange delivering my lunch? Hm. Tempting)

Extra nice people. This is the perfect example of pregnancy ups and downs. Sure, it's good that most people are nicer than usual, more attentive etc. but along with their attention, come the advices, the dos and don’t’s. Sometimes I find them totally ridiculous and illogical. Being sceptical, I don’t fully believe them. being a mum to be and a woman (hence the guilt), I felt obligated to check just in case. Oh, I also hate it when strangers/not so close relatives/not so close friends touching my belly. make me feel like a freakshow.

Changing hormones. The result is that am easily irritated and cried more often (cried 2 days when aa & neng left, choked when I watched sappy movies). The most annoying thing is being absentminded. Am so forgetful sometimes I don’t remember little things I just did (finding empty glass of milk with no recollection of drinking it, have to check the schedule more often, constantly asked this to chubbs: have I done …..? and chubbs looking at me like ‘duh! You just did’).

Bigger size. Which means I often lose my sense of space: trying to squeeze my self into thin space (lil sista will look at me with ‘are you mad’ look on her face) and bumping things (happens a lot with my bum which often caused things to drop. Heh heh.). not just belly & bum, but also fingers and toes which has its ups (new shoes!!! Yaay!!) and downs (fatter finger does not mean I can buy new ring, but sure does make me lose my coordination. Felt like I have 10 thumbs)

Sex. miss my libido. miss feeling horny. miss having and enjoying sex.

On the other hand, I felt so sexy with this huuuuge belly and breast. Finally have cleavage. Haha.

The wriggly tummy. I like to touch my belly and feel the baby squirming here and there. i like the way my tummy feel when she moves about, how the movement is more defined when she gets bigger and my uterus is getting cramped. Definitely going to miss that.

Baby, if you happen to read this much much later on, please don’t think that I don’t like having you. On the contrary, I enjoy every minute of it.
It is uncomfortable, sometimes even annoying, but I am sure it was all worth it because in the end am gonna meet you.